I started writing this blog 3 years ago because I thought what I have to say could make a difference. Turns out what I have to say does not even make a difference to the ones who mean the world to me, how would it help strangers?
I thought I had a voice, but it turns out, giving me a voice in the relationship was a just a courtesy since important decisions, decisions that would affect all involved would never be made with my help. I had to sit back and watch as someone made a monumental decision that would affect me in ways I cannot begin to explain.
The person we are deep inside, is essentially the person we will be all through our lives, with certain life experiences slightly altering who we are at different stages. Sometimes destiny gives us a second chance. Since who we are does not really change much, the same problems tend to arise, but the second chance should mean that we need to deal with it in a different way. Yes, the same thing happened again, but we could use the first time as an example and choose to deal with it in a different way this time around. We didn’t. I guess I just had nothing interesting to say. Nothing interesting enough to make them stay. What a world we live in, where people call walking away from relationships “facing reality” while making the ones who want to stay and fight for a relationship they have so much faith in, look delusional. When you want something to work out, you have to make it work. People just don’t get that.
I have decided to stop writing this blog. I have nothing more of value to add. I give up. I cannot do this anymore. I believed in something too much only to realise that the basis for those beliefs no longer exist. I see no point in anything.
I wanted to add a ‘thank you’ to my readers for staying with me for so long. I’m sorry I don’t think my voice matters enough to make a difference. I’m sorry I couldn’t do much. Thank you for reading my words.