‘Know Thyself’ is a personal growth exercise. I think I’ve done it before, in one of my earliest blog posts. The purpose of doing it again to see how far I’ve come since then. I pulled the questions off Pinterest, and I haven’t looked at all of them yet (yet, meaning since I started writing this post.) Will look at each one before I answer it, so as to get an immediate and honest reply, without giving myself much time to alter and change my answers. So here goes:
- What does your ideal day look like?
My ideal day would have to be a nice sunny day, where I could sit somewhere, with a book. I have a couple of places in Auckland City and I have done it during the summer months. I walk the streets of the city to my special place. Me, a book and a cup of coffee. Sounds absolutely perfect to me.
- What did you want to be when you were younger?
When I was little, I remember I wanted to be a teacher. Mostly, because I wanted to be able to tell kids what they could and could not do. Now I realise I never would’ve been good at it. I’m not great with kids. I have taught a few classes on several occasions and the experience of it was unlike anything I’ve ever done before. It made me feel a whole new level of respect for teachers. My cousin sister is a teacher and she is gifted when it comes to dealing with kids. I love watching her and it makes me feel more shitty about my ‘child skills’. LOL
- Who are you most inspired by? Why?
This is simple and honest – my mum. She’s my lifeline. She is the strongest person I know. Everything I do, I do for her. No matter the challenges she faced in her life, she never let us feel like we lacked anything. She kept us happy and through it all I realised that family, no matter how messed up, is everything. She believed in me, when everyone else doubted me. I have made mistakes. Some big. But like many others, her opinion of me was never tainted by them. Because of her I have come to realise that my vulnerability is not a weakness and I should stick to people who understand that.
- Who would you love to meet? And what would you ask?
After 12 years of watching the show like it is a religion to me, I would very much love to go to SDCC and meet Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki and maybe the entire cast of Supernatural. Jensen and Jared also known as J2, play brothers, Dean and Sam Winchester. They come as across as hilarious, humble, family guys who just appreciate the fandom. I did warn my readers in my very first blog post that there will be a lot of fangirling happening here. THIS IS IT. Just look at them. I love them.
I would ask them this: If, and when, the show gets done (it is just completed its 12th season and has already been renewed for a 13th), what are they hoping to take away from it?
- What habit would you like to break? What habit would you like to start?
I would like to break my habit of constantly worrying. I worry about things that may not even happen and I exhaust myself. Sometimes the things I have no control over, keep me up at night, these days more than ever.
I would like to start living in the moment.
- Think of a person you truly admire. What qualities do you like about that person?
I admire their positive outlook of life. They have the ability to look at a problem, step back and find the positives in a situation and will make it so that the positives far outweigh the negatives. When I think about life, I realise how essential it is to be that way. Throw faith, hope and belief into it and that makes up the person I truly admire.
- How do you like to relax?
I would love to say, lying on the beach somewhere with a drink in my hand but seeing as that hasn’t happened yet, I would have to go with a book, some green tea and cold nights in my room. My lazyboy is an added bonus. Total bliss.
- When was the last time you did something you were afraid of?
I am doing it right now. Have you heard that saying “If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough”? Well, it was my dream to study abroad. I’m doing it right now and it is terrifying. More because now I need to figure a new dream. I’m happy I have an excellent support system. So much positive vibes.
- What are you most proud of?
I’m hoping this does not come across as arrogant, but I am proud that I did not give up on my dreams. No matter what people said. Everything in life has its risks, some bigger than others, but as much as it scared me it did not stop me.
- What are you most of afraid of?
Losing the people I love. Followed very closely by ‘Failure’.
- If life ended today, what would you regret not doing?
Without sounding too cheesy, I would regret not getting my shot at being in love with someone and actually having that person be in love with me. No bullshit. No lies. Total communication and honesty. That’s it.
- Who would you like to connect (or reconnect) with? Why?
I do not have an immediate reply for this one. I do not have anyone I’d like to connect with.
If I’ve cut people out of my life, I have done it for good reason and I have never regretted my decisions to do so.
- What qualities do you admire in others?
Confidence (in themselves, in others or situations) and resilience.
- What practical skills do you wish you had?
I wish I had better computer skills. And math skills.
- Imagine you’re in your 90’s. What memories would you like to have? What stories do you want to tell?
I would want to be able to talk about the fact that I checked off everything on my bucket list. People talk about traveling the world. I want that too. But I have a list of specific places I want to go to. I’m hoping by 90 I would have visited them all.
I would also tell stories about journeys I’ve been on both real and literary.
- What is your favourite book/ movie/ song? Why?
This is literally the hardest question for me to answer. I read a lot. I will try to break it down.
Classic: Pride & Prejudice – Jane Austen
Series: Harry Potter. Those books changed my life forever.
Over all I have too many books I love. No bookworm would ever be able to pick out a favourite book.
All the Marvel movies because it’s all connected.
Romance: Letters to Juliet. I dunno what it is about this movie. I keep going back to it over and over.
There are many many more movies I love.
Keeps changing. I cannot pick one. LOL
- If you could make one change in the world, what would it be?
Realistically, this would not be possible but I dream about it a lot. I would erase the existence of Donald Trump. I’m not American, so he is not my President. But I get this sick feeling in my stomach when I hear him speak or even look at his face. He is everything, that I, as a woman, am against. He’s so focused on showing the world the might of the United States of America and is completely screwing his own people over.
I’m not the best when it comes to politics. In fact, I usually stay out of it. But he just makes me so mad because I have a friend in the US who was directly affected by the shitty policies his government are coming up with.
- What do you love to do for, or give others (not an object – something from you personally)?
Hmmmm one of my best friends paints and made me a painting of the TARDIS for my 23rd Birthday. Unfortunately, I’m not artistic. I try.
I do love to sing and when that makes people happy, I’m happy. I used to sing for my mum all the time just to cheer her up. I haven’t sung in front of people in a really long time now.
- What excites you?
Finding a book store I haven’t visited before. I get super excited about book stores. And libraries. But in the long run, the thought of the endless possibilities of my life excite me.
- What piece of advice would you give to five year old you? Sixteen year old you? Twenty-one year old you? Right now?
I would tell five year old me to be strong because there are tough times ahead that will require her to grow up before her time. But don’t stop dreaming and keep praying.
I would tell sixteen year old me to enjoy the rollercoaster ride till it lasts. Because she’s not gonna marry him.
I would tell twenty-one year old me to not give up. Ever.
Right now I keep telling myself to have faith in myself the way certain people have faith in me.